NC TRUTHY CENTRAL for People Who Read Headlines Only
Welcome to the Beaufort County Cabal—your one-stop shop for high-confidence vibes, low-evidence takes, and algorithm-friendly outrage.
Disclaimer: This website is a satirical parody. It is not a news source. It is not affiliated with any campaign, party, or local government entity.
Today’s Cabal Briefing
Auto-generated for maximum certainty.
Exposing Spin. Delivering… More Spin.
We provide bold claims, dramatic headings, and screenshots of things you can’t click. Perfect for sharing before you finish reading.
Case Files + Vibes
Every “CASE#” is curated using our patented process: Find • Frame • Fury.
- •Start with a conclusion
- •Search for supporting vibes
- •Ignore the rest (self-care)
Join the Cabal
No email. No forms. No commitment. Just click a button and receive a totally official, very serious membership moment.
Satire note: clicking does not enroll you in anything. (We don’t even have a database. We barely have a plan.)
Auto-Policy™ Generator Turn vibes into talking points. Instantly. Loudly. Prompting’s so easy anyone can do it — which explains… a lot.
Because why read a report when you can generate a platform with three buzzwords and a confident tone? AI is the future of politics — or at least the future of posting.
Output is randomly generated satire. If you use it unironically, that’s on you.